"We shoulda signed Jake Scott a month ago"...Fancy Football...and Eagles vs. 'Skins...

Written by Thomas Jackson on .

That headline about Jake Scott actually comes from BriSuksEgg FF League President JB-Sage-Lion, who it turns out has been churning out entertaining pearls of humor and wisdom in his running commentary at the ESPN league office. I just discovered the link to the actual FF league office thanks to Sage-Lion... if you hit this link, you will be taken to a satellite world of football fun and information JB-style:

http://games.espn.go.com/ffl/leagueoffice?leagueId=962424&seasonId=2012

Here's a sample of JB's running commentary: "We shoulda signed [tackle/guard] Jake Scott a month ago..." [he's right!]...Former Champ Jerked Angora Rabbit wins The Bri Ass Hat for a 3rd week in a row! Amazing! 3-way tie this week.... Jerked Angora Rabbit sat Stafford and his 36... Bri Lion and Dem sat Andy Dalton and his 36.... and Spliffy sat Rivers and his 36! 3 way tie! Amazing! "Huds Strumpets coming on strong behind AD, The Muscle Hamster and his powerful D's!!!!!!!!!!!!!! p.s. boner Lion knows exactly how powerful Huddy's D is. Trust me on that one. "

And you can get breakdowns on the FF team standings, stats, players and other interesting angles. By the way, here are the current BSE Standings, broken down into East and West divisions"

Standings

 

East
1. Bri'sFantasy Boys 7-2-1 L1
2. Splunker Valley Skunk Apes 6-3-1 L1
3. The Great PPW 6-4 W3
4. Harold Harmonica 5-5 L1
5. Hoof Hearted Ice Melted 3-6-1 L2
6. Palm Feathers 2-8 L3
West
1. HUDROCKS HOE STABLES 7-3 W4
2. Dirty n Stinkin Bums 6-4 W2
3. Evans Head Beanstalk 6-4 W1
4. The Bri Slapper 6-4 W1
5. Team BIG BONE 2-7-1 L3
6. Jetpack Ninja Dinosaurs 2-8 W1
Updated Thursday, November 15, 2012

Back to Jake Scott...

New Eagles offensive lineman Jake Scott arrived at the NovaCare Complex Wednesday in time for practice. Depending on how quickly he can pick up the Eagles' offense, he could see action as soon as Sunday against the Redskins.

"My job is to fit in wherever they need me," Scott said. "I have to be ready this Sunday."

Scott, 31, has plenty of experience. He started 121 regular-season games and nine playoff contests in seven seasons with Indianapolis (2004-07) and Tennessee (2008-11). While with the Colts, he played for Eagles offensive line coach Howard Mudd.

Scott said he sat out the first nine weeks of the regular season while waiting for the right opportunity. The Eagles' offensive line has been riddled with injuries to center Jason Kelce (two torn knee ligaments), and tackles Todd Herremans (dislocated foot bone) and Jason Peters (ruptured Achilles' tendon). Guard Danny Watkins (chronic ankle soreness) missed the last three games, though he's expected to start against the Redskins.

"It was tough sitting at home and watching on TV," Scott said. "But I wanted to wait for the right situation. This is a good one for me because I'll have a chance to play right away and this team has a chance to make it to the playoffs."

With Watkins returning to right guard, rookie Dennis "Hagrid" Kelly will be working with Demetress Bell and King Dunlap at tackle during practice this week. Kelly could get a shot at right tackle, considering Dunlap played very poorly against the Cowboys.

Kelly served as a backup tackle earlier this season before getting moved to guard. "I feel like playing guard will help me playing tackle," Kelly said Wednesday. "It should make it a little easier because now I have a better idea of what the guy next to me is doing."

Mike Vick (concussion) did not practice Wednesday or Thursday and has yet to take any post-concussion tests. Wide receiver Jason Avant (strained hamstring) will not play against the Redskins. He has not missed a game since 2008. Wide receiver/punt returner Mardy Gilyard (strained hamstring) and running back Chris Polk (sprained toe) are also out. Wide receiver Jeremy Maclin (lower back strain) said Wednesday that he expects to play.

(If the "comments counter" button doesn't show at the bottom of this blurg, just double-click on the Title at the top to get into the Livefyre comments section...)

 

409 comments
AbeLinc64
AbeLinc64

Might be an omen or bettin info Skins have lost 8 in a row to rookie QB's.

AbeLinc64
AbeLinc64 like.author.displayName 1 Like

For all you old fogies out there MEDICARE going up in 2013:

 

Average folks going up $5. to 104.90 a month.  For you rich geezers $85,000 - $170,000 you pay additional $42.00 to $230.80 a month

 

Hospitalization deductable goes up $28 to $1,184 befor hospitalization insurance kicks in.

 

Outpatient goes up $7.00 to $147.00

 

Let the good times roll and I'm here to help the little people.

 

philly.com/news

Kent Phil 1967
Kent Phil 1967 like.author.displayName 1 Like

It's Fecking Bed time ... Good night fellas

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName 1 Like

Damn near kilt 'em!!!!!

PPW
PPW

Rectum

PPW
PPW

butthole

PPW
PPW

butt hole

PPW
PPW

hole

TheGreatJB99
TheGreatJB99

STORMIN MORMONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!11!1!!!1

 

Should I wartch the Jazz... or BYU vs FSU?

PPW
PPW

 @TheGreatJB99 Since you have to watch your mouth does anything else matter?

PPW
PPW

butt

PPW
PPW

Testes

PPW
PPW

Yang of ox

TheGreatJB99
TheGreatJB99

I SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!1

 

"Awaiting Approval"

PPW
PPW

Fargin iceholes

TheGreatJB99
TheGreatJB99

One times... I got in the shower.... to do my web cam show I do on Fridays at 10pm for older men only... and then I turned the knob... and no water came out. So... I put most of my clothes back on... went outside... and decided I had a busted water line somewheres... so I start following the line around the yard... trying to find evidence of breakage... but alas... could not find anything. Then I decided that it must be in the house... or foundation. So I went back in... started looking around.... and started checking out my bills... and realized I hadnt paid the water bill in 4 monfs.

This comment has been deleted

PPW
PPW

TJ, we implore you-please stop the insanity!!!!!!!!!

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName 1 Like

I just had a terrible thought-what if this censorship doo doo spreads to AVIs????????? Jerked Up, are you reading me?????

Jerky
Jerky like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

 @PPW HERE WILL BE AN UPRISING!!

PPW
PPW

I have faith that this Motley Crue can work around this censorship bs. It's just so poopy crap sad that we have to.

Jerky
Jerky like.author.displayName 1 Like

Poop and turds and  chinga tu madre!!

PPW
PPW

poopy crap balls

Spiffo
Spiffo like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

Oops... wifeys here... gotta run.... catch youse later...

Brozer8
Brozer8 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

I'm boycotting these COMMIE BAST ERDS !!!!!!!!  (and yes, it censored bas terds too, and this is my 3rd re-edit of this post)

 

!!!!!!!!!!!!  I"M LEAVING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

PPW
PPW

I cherish freedom of speech. This is incredulous!

Spiffo
Spiffo like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @PPW It's bullshit!!!!

PPW
PPW

 @Spiffo You're the only one that can post cus words......YOU are behind this travesty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Brozer8
Brozer8 like.author.displayName 1 Like

Fat....my drink suggestion got censored....so I'll repost in new PC format:

 

Crystal Lite Berry Blue,....and a half shot of Vodka.

 

I believe the drink is called a "P h  a  g".

 

Maybe try that.

 

Spiffo
Spiffo

 @Brozer8 fuck....

Brozer8
Brozer8 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

 @Spiffo well Spifflo, this is about as nasty as I can get to you now,....but here goes:

 

Your below average.

 

SNAP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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