I beg your Pardo... and Spiffo settles the JPP vs. Reggie White comparison...

Written by Thomas Jackson on .

Every now and then I need to ask Don Pardo for a favor. I begged him for a story idea on the Eagles. He came up with the Uniform Numbers Game...

donpardo

[Spoken in a perfect Brizzini dialect] ---"As for blurb inspiration, I think we should go with the best Eagles Player to 'don' the Numbers from 1 to 99...All time. You can split it in 5 parts. Like 1-19.. 20-39..40-59..etc.. Give a little blurb about how good or great each player was..Also time he
played on the Eagles. It will be fun for this dead period. You can even "puff" the article with; "what's in a number..."--- luck, destiny,
tradition, et cetera..."

"I will start....

tonyfranklin

1) Tony Franklin
2) David Akers
3) Eddie Murray
4) Max Runager - yes better than Kevin Kolb
5) Donovan McNabb
6) Bubby Brister
7) Ron Jaworski
8) Paul McFadden
9) Sonny Jurgensen or Joe Pisarcik (Polish Cannon)
10) Desean Jackson
11) Norm Van Brocklin
12) Randall Cunningham
13) *******There is none..enough said*******
14) Swede Hanson but really I liked AJ "Touchy" Feeley..
15) Steve Van Buren
16) Norm Snead ..not Chad Hall.btw.why is Chad Hall even on this team?
17) Harold Carmichael...legend!
18) Jeremy Maclin..yes over Donte Stallworth
19) Tom Dempsey..half a foot, half an arm, but whole heart!!!! Loved Him!
20) Brian Dawkins...special nod goes to Andre Waters.."

"Now go take care of your business, as I must rejoin my family's celebration..."

THANK YOU, Don Pardo, for your inspiration, you are truly godfather to us all...

Speaking of numbers, we all know who #91 would be in Don Pardo's Numbers Game--- the late great Reggie White. And our resident IT guy Spiffo (aka Tom Frank) crunched some numbers for us to help squash the shallow but trending comparison of the Giants' Jason Pierre-Paul to a modern day Reggie White.
reggiewhite2


Why Reggie White will always be better than JPP

By Tom (Spiffo) Frank

 

There has been some discussion about why JPP is the next Reggie White.  While I know (and everybody with two eyes knows) that JPP is good, he just isn’t Reggie White good.  Sunbutts was speculating the other day that when JPP retires, fans will be saying. “Reggie who?”  While this both shows his ignorance and the wide blue streak down his back, it brings up an interesting point. Even if JPP smashes every record held by Reggie White, would that make him the better player and erase Reggie from the history books? I don’t think so, and here’s why:

 

1)      Reggie White was a phenom. I don’t mean that he played beyond his abilities, but he played beyond everyone’s abilities. He was crazy good.  JPP is a very physical athlete. Doing several back flips down the football field in full pads is impressive and shows his athleticism and raw talent. Maybe he would have been a good ballerina.

2)      Reggie White was an anchor. Don’t get me wrong, the defense was good without Reggie, but with Reggie in there, there was no stopping it.  JPP is part of a gang. His Defense was good without him, and is still good with him. Unstoppable? Hardly.

3)      The Eagles had a defense with a “name” like “the Steel Curtain”, “Blitzburgh”, and “the Orange Crush”… With Reggie and Jerome Brown in there, we had “Gang Green”.  What’s the Giants’ D name?  “The Fake Injury D”?

4)      Reggie broke records and players alike. He didn’t mind smarshing heads to get where he wanted. He didn’t care about the record books and the statistics he was putting up, he liked to play the game. JPP seems like a nice guy, but I don’t see him helping anybody but himself.

5)      Reggie had class. The “Minister of Defense” would beat a man down into the mud and then help him up after the whistle. He would smile while he sacked the QB, then help him up and give him a friendly word.  JPP will get the sack then do his celebration dance.

 

Statistically, Reggie dominated his entire career:

 

Year – GP – GS – Sacks – Tackles – Assists

1985 – 13 -  12  -   13     -     100    -    0

1986 – 16 -  16  -   18     -      98     -    0

1987 – 12 -  12  -   21     -      76     -    0

1988 – 16 -  16  -   18     -     133    -    0

1989 - 16 –  16  -   11     -     123    -    0

1990 – 16  - 16  -   14     -      83     -    0

1991 – 16  - 16  -   15     -     100    -    0

1992 -  16 – 16 -    14     -      81     -    0

1993 -  16 -  16  -   13    -      79     -    0

1994 -  16 -  15  -    8     -      35     -   14

1995 -  15  - 13  -   12    -      31     -    11

1996 -  16  - 16  -   8.5   -      30     -     9

1997 -  16  - 16   -  11    -      31     -   15

1998 -  16  - 16   -  16    -      33     -   13

2000 -  16  - 16   -  5.5   -      15     -    1

 

Meanwhile JPP is doing very well in his second year:

 

Year – GP – GS – Sacks – Tackles – Assists

2010 -  16  -  0   -  4.5    -     17       -   5

2011 -  16  - 12  -  16.5  -     72       -  21

 

Furthermore, Reggie went to 13 Pro-Bowls and was All-Pro 8 times. JPP has been to 1 Pro-Bowl and was All-Pro once. I’m sure that JPP will attend several more Pro-Bowls, if they continue the game, but with a shorter life-span of players these days, I don’t think he’ll make 13.

 

Can JPP keep it up for 15 years? I don’t know. And neither does anybody else. It’s a ridiculous comparison to put a second year player up against a legend.


Spiffo
Spiffo as I imagine him in my movie, played by Ed Begley, Jr.

Thanks to Spiffo for that piece... Open Mike Week continues next time with Dutchie and PPW, and with Dr. Funt on deck...

248 comments
AbeLinc64
AbeLinc64 like.author.displayName 1 Like

New Blast from TJack. It's story by the Shoo Fly Pie guy. 

TheGreatJB99
TheGreatJB99 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 4 Like

Welp.... I'm off to the gym.

 

Youse have fun arguing with moonbean.

 

When I finish my workout.... my biceps will be able to crush atv's nads like Bri does with his stiletto heels.

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName 1 Like

@TheGreatJB99 No need to worry bout me balls... Your sister takes care of them quite nicely and for a reasonable price too... What wiff all the extra service and attention she pays in to the region and points souff... No crushing though... That'll get that biatch slapped and she done knows better already!

dutchrubb
dutchrubb like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

Hey,

The abbreviation for "Butt Swami" would be B.S.  Any coincidence? 

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@dutchrubb Coincidence no... Appropriate yes

dutchrubb
dutchrubb like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @atvcar  So, we can call him the ACBS then.

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@atvcar I thought he was the #3 LP?

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@dutchrubb Or just sunnbutts... It's a catch all

sunbutts
sunbutts like.author.displayName 1 Like

Damn--Beansprout caught me in a error of the first magnitude--or did he?

 

There are about 100k Maori in Australia, although they are not aboriginal. (my mistake). These people are generally the class of the S. Pacific area. (if you excuse a few head hunter and cannibal offshoots). When one traces the Maori DNA it takes them to a Polynesian class of intrepid people of high adventure and mostly sterling character. Their basic culture was (and is?) enlightened and humane.

 

Conversely, when one tracks the DNA of the common Aussie, one is generally led back to the denizens of the most degenerative slums and prisons of London. Thus the national inferiority complex and the subsequent bravado posturing.

 

So you see, the Maori of Australia are on a much higher plane of human nobility than the English (caucasian ) element of that continent.

 

I stand firm in all my previous posts conclusions except where noted.

 

So let it be written!

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName 1 Like

@sunbutts BTW... You took some MAJOR liberties with thy Wikipedia posting on the Maori... Yeh I can google too... Did you miss the part where only 22% of the Maori speak their own language and it is the convict class Aussie's who are trying to preserve the culture? Sadly, I and everyone else can already predict your response... So lemme just say in advance to your predictability... Lame!

sunbutts
sunbutts

 @atvcar  How does their language reflect on their DNA?

Capeesh?

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@sunbutts Haha... Says the pot to the kettle

sunbutts
sunbutts

 @atvcar  You are not anywhere as bright as you THINK you are!

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName 1 Like

@sunbutts As I stated in advance... Lame

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@sunbutts So to sum up... even when you're clearly wrong you will still in your "mind" be right?

dutchrubb
dutchrubb like.author.displayName 1 Like

Well Sunny, we gonna have to find another way to make you famous. The Urban Dicks denied my definition of Sunbutts. Maybe if I would have submitted a few of your posts as evidence...................they would have had no choice but to agree.  I am sure that would sway them in my favor.

sunbutts
sunbutts

 @dutchrubb What pathetic attempts at insults. Only a hick would think of such drivel as worthy of publication. The mentality  you display is of average IQ and is steeped in rural interests. That's OK-- but when a yokel starts to become obtrusive, it can get nauseating.

 

The Internet is a great communication medium, but it is tiresome in that it gives equal voice to people who are normally--and rightfully-- ignored.

 

My advice to Dutchy: stick to Pa. Dutch traditions--dwell unobtrusively in you simple world--and thrive!

 

Bye!--and good luck to you and yours!

 

 

dutchrubb
dutchrubb like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

 @sunbutts We will let the rest of the people here decide if they are good insults..................you are not the final answer. And the fact that you gave such a stinging retort means I am on to something. 

 

You say the internet is "tiresome". It is only tiresome to someone like yourself when you don't get your own way AND don't get to talk YOUR drivel unchallenged.

 

So if you continue to talk out your ass. Expect to get challenged on it...........especially here. And there is nothing you can do about it...............welp, there is one thing. You could follow the advice of the French.  But I am sure that is the one thing you won't do.

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName 1 Like

@dutchrubb @atvcar Hey don't tread on me Dutchie!

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

I guess you could say we're studs.

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@atvcar Yes yes we're well balanced.

dutchrubb
dutchrubb like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

 @atvcar Good to see you can join in with the tire jokes.

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

@dutchrubb @PPW You two sure seem aligned

dutchrubb
dutchrubb like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

 @PPW  Yeah..........thanks for the setup.

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@dutchrubb @sunbutts Ba dump bump pssh!

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

@dutchrubb @sunbutts And then recycled into a doormat?

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

@dutchrubb @sunbutts Not too hard.... It could burst his sidewalls.

PPW
PPW like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

@dutchrubb @sunbutts Heh heh.... TIREsome

donpardo
donpardo like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

#25 - Tommy McDonald - I made an addendum...he was a HOF'er...

#26 - Ben Smith...very nice DB...part of the "Gang Green" Defense....

#27 - Quintin Mikell - Liked that guy every since he came out...on Christmas Day made a TD Goal line tackle on Marion Barber years back that literally saved the game for the Birds....that was back when Barber was a beasty...

#28 - Bill Bradley - They guy held for PK, played Safety at a Pro-Bowl level and even was the back-up punter....great athlete.

#29 - Since I gave Shady's number to Tommy McDonald - I will go "OLD SCHOOL SHADY" and give him the rookie jersey nod....Should have kept that number...Either way - Shady is a "solid"!

#30 - Brian Mitchelll....this was a toughy...Even though Mitchell will be remembered as a Skin...He was awesome in Philly as well...Joe Lavender, Safety in the 70s was good.  As was Otis Smith and Charlie Garner("Lightning") to Ricky Waters' "Thunder"...Also JR Reed would have been great except that "small" medical issue that resulted from a chain link fence.  Ruined his career, grummit!

briview
briview like.author.displayName 1 Like

Welp,..I buy talc ,.once a decade,..time's up......off to the apoth.......GK.

beanstalk
beanstalk like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

well what are betting on it?

Kent Phil 1967
Kent Phil 1967 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

Second match is today at the Oval

 

Sunday, 1 July 2012NatWest One Day International SeriesEngland v Australia, The Kia Oval, 10:45

beanstalk
beanstalk like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

pommy git!!!!!!!!! is there a one dayer on?

Kent Phil 1967
Kent Phil 1967 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

 @beanstalk Hahahah

 

In SummaryEngland win first ODI by 15 runsEngland 272-5 after losing toss at Lord'sMorgan 89no; Trott 54; Bell 41; Cook 40Australia 257-9Clarke 61; Warner 56; Lee 29noEngland take 1-0 lead in five-match series

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

Evening Beano...

beanstalk
beanstalk like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

 @atvcar

 oi....i am struggling.....being an alco is hard work

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName 1 Like

@beanstalk But nobel work work... You're the right man for the job!

beanstalk
beanstalk like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @atvcar  @beanstalk

 true...would shock me at all.... But I can't find a woman I can put up with for more than 3 months

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@beanstalk That you know of anyway?

atvcar
atvcar like.author.displayName 1 Like

@beanstalk Wait till ya have a tyke to chase around.... You'll pray for a death by alcohol

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